"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?"- Abraham Lincoln

"Its better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."- Abraham Lincoln

"Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless."- Sinclair Lewis

"The honeymoon is over when he phones to say he'll be late for dinner and she's already left a note that it's in the refrigerator."- Bill Lawrence

"The modern pantheist not only sees the god in everything, he takes photographs of it."- D.H. Lawrence

"An infallible method of conciliating a tiger is to allow oneself to be devoured."- Konrad Adenauer

"Why did Nature create man? Was it to show that she is big enough to make mistakes, or was it pure ignorance?"- Holbrook Jackson

"When women go wrong, men go right after them."- Mae West

"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." - Jack Nicholson